kairi-the-bat

yes I am insane :P

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Love brings pain by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Love brings pain

Love brings pain, And with it loss, I lie here again, Feeling guilty for being cross, But still I hope, And still I fear, That I will hang by the rope, Of what I long for so dear, Crushing my heart, Waiting for change, The more we are apart, The more it feels strange, A unknown grief, For what could not be, Brings a small relief, Less for you to flee, The tighter I held you, The more you pulled away, And now I fear its true, That you will never stay...

Thunder and lightning by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Thunder and lightning

A storm in the summer, Piercing icy blue, Crimson and copper, The flames they only grew, One like thunder, Terrifying and mighty, The lightning falls under, And neither tread lightly, A whirlwind of lust, Kissing in the rain, Testing the trust, Risking all the pain, A almost perfect pair, Just mismatched in time, Left gasping for air, Intoxicating and sublime...

Why do I miss you? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Why do I miss you?

Why do I miss you? Why do I long? For a love that was never, For a love that was wrong, We wouldn’t work out, That much is true, Cause I just couldn’t, Come between him and you, How can someone so good, Stand by someone so bad, When they know what a monster, He becomes when he’s mad, You lifted my spirit, You woke up my heart, Found a way inside it, Though we’ve always been apart, You treated me like a human, Instead of just some dirt, Like I am more than just, What’s underneath my shirt, You knew my darkest secret, Knew my deepest fears, Knew things that had troubled me, Like you’d been here years, You&#

Feelings inside by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Feelings inside

It’s easy to hide, Easy to ignore, The feelings inside, That are different to before, It’s easy to run, Easy to pretend, While chasing the sun, I’ll say you’re just a friend, Can’t look you in the eye, Can’t get myself too near, It’s harder to hold the lie, With you the rest disappears, Im not ready for the fall, Too tired for the chase, Can I risk it all, If you join the race, One look took my breath away, My heart skipped a beat, So little you had to say, To make me feel defeat, I wish I could know, What’s going on in your head, But you never show, Only baffle me instead, I count

Judas by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Judas

I see you Judas over there, I see the way you stop and stare, What’s with the way you look at me? Is it curiosity? Or do you wonder, Just like me, Why hearts thunder, When together are we, He’d hate us, if he found out, But I just want to scream and shout, About the way that my heart sings, Wants to tell you the slightest things, About my day, About my fears, But what do I say? Chance disappears, We both turn away, Run from our minds, Maybe one day, Love we will find...

Strangers connected by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Strangers connected

You don’t know me, You know my secrets, We have history, We have regrets, I look at you, You look at me, When you do, What do you see? Do you see beauty? Do you see pain? Would you stick to your duty, If you felt the same? We’ve barely spoke, Shared hundreds of words, Around you I choke, My chest filled with birds, Dying to be free, Dying to get out, Do you see? How I want to shout, To call out your name, To hear your voice, Would I be to blame, If you had to make a choice? Could you save me, From myself? Could you be, Thinking the same yourself? When I’m near you, The noise stops, I don’t know what to do, My heart

Dancing alone by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Dancing alone

I’m dancing alone, Feeling free, Dreaming that you, Are here with me, The lyrics they call, Resonate in my soul, I just wish I had you, To make this symphony whole, I wonder how you’d feel, To see me here now, I wish I could read you, Some way some how, I wish I was confident, I wish I was strong, I wish I could tell you, And not feel so wrong, Now this heart beats, Once again in its cage, I find myself putting, My mask on your stage...

Could it be you? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Could it be you?

I walk alone, Through the night, Nothing but the, Stars in sight, I drift on the breeze, Trail through the trees, Making me calmer, When life brings me to my knees, I follow your words, Try to find my place, Cause even if I run, No one will give chase, I long for someone, To understand, Even if only, To hold my hand, Someone to listen, Someone to care, Someone to be there, When my mind is so unfair, Could it be you? Will you look and see? Will you think one day, The one for you is me..?

Angel I hide from by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Angel I hide from

I want to tell you the world, All of my secrets, All of my truths, Even the regrets, But I can’t trust you, Can’t let you in, Can’t let myself live you, Cause that’s how it begins, I fall too hard, I fall too fast, I fall for the loves, That can never last, I don’t know you, You don’t know me, I know our hearts, Just aren’t meant to be, I can’t look at you, I don’t ever dare, So afraid I will see, Someone to love there, So I run and I hide, I just laugh and lie, Then the loneliness hits, And I just want to cry, I felt so numb, Until you awoken, This fragile heart, That has already be

Dare I look? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Dare I look?

Dare I look? In case I see, That you are more, Than what I want you to be, I can’t let my self, Fall for you, So I’ll resist, And try to get through, I can’t help but wonder, What you think of me, Especially since you, Make me feel free, I could walk, For miles with you, Don’t want it to end, Don’t know what to do, I can’t let you in, Cause then I might fall, Have to hold it back, Keep up the wall, Have to hide what I feel, Hide what I think, Cause if I don’t, I fear I’ll sink...

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Why do I miss you? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Why do I miss you?

Feelings inside by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Feelings inside

Judas by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Judas

Strangers connected by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Strangers connected

Dancing alone by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Dancing alone

Could it be you? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Could it be you?

Angel I hide from by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Angel I hide from

Dare I look? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

Dare I look?

What is this feeling? by kairi-the-bat, literature

Literature

What is this feeling?

What’s this feeling? What’s this fear? Why do I yearn for you, Even though you aren’t near? What a strange thing, That when I think of you, I just want to sing, What should I do? You’ve made me feel, When I was numb, How can it be real? When I feel so dumb, My heart beats faster, My mind grows still, How can I master, This strange type of ill? I know that I blush, When you are near, I feel the need to rush, Is this more than just a crush? You don’t feel the same, But you turn my brain to mush, It’s filled with your name....

Unspoken by kairi-the-bat, literature

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conflicting thoughts by kairi-the-bat, journal

conflicting thoughts

Oct 10, 2011

so last time i wrote my journal i was talking about how me and sherlock had made up and started talking again and been babysitting my brother and sister together and everything was good and wed had random discussions about having a kid together and stuff like that, well since then me and sherlock have done more babysitting and joking on and the usual sort of things, i even managed to bite and bruise him for a change (although he did manage to bruise me worse than other times, this one started bleeding :'() anyway then we've had the weekend where we didnt talk as much partly because i had work and partly because he was spending time with peop

For My Best Friend by kuroi-nekochan, literature

Unrequited by drkangl, literature

Literature

Unrequited

Here I sit just lost in my mind wondering just what it would be like To hold you, to touch you to know you You'd never see me in a crowded room would never even catch your eye But here I am with a head full of dreams and a heart full of emotion That I'll just never understand If I could only reach out and brush this hand upon your flesh Would you feel it? would you even notice I'm alive? Or would you simply feel a flutter and nothing more? Even if I could permeate a radiant glow You wouldn't notice I'd remain in these shadows Solitaire in my mournful cries My tears unnoticed My heart a shameless relic No, you'd never fee

Unrequited Love... by strawberry--x, literature

Literature

Unrequited Love...

You watch him from a distance You love to see him smile You wish one day he might be yours If only for a while You wish that you could tell him To have the strength to say, "I love you and I wish that you Could feel the same one day!" Your heart beats as he comes towards you Only to walk on by You try to tell yourself you don't love him Try to believe your lie… You wish, you dream, you hope, you pray That you could be together Maybe if you could make him see That you two could last forever.....

Who will suicide hurt? by extremerebirth1, literature

Literature

Who will suicide hurt?

Empty and cold inside Is this all that's left This narration inside my mind These thoughts The ability to have these thought is the only thing keeping me alive What would it be without them No pain to think about Nothing to worry about I wouldn't need to cry anymore I'd still be empty, but atleast I wouldn't have to know it I can't cry anyway There are no tears left inside It's like my sorrow is too much to express But would others cry What about my parents, my friends, my one true love, would they cry My parents wouldn't shed a tear I have to friends to shed tears for me For me, there exists no one true love There is no lover to shed a te

Suicide by MD-Arts, literature

Literature

Suicide

I just want to die. Oh please, allow me To leave and to fly Above the blue sea. I just want to try To save all of thee Who fall and who cry; But you cannot see My will and my heart! You're neglecting me As well as my art. No more will I be The ghost that protects Each of your beauties. I, too, will neglect Your so profound seas. No one sees my soul; Its brightness will be Swallowed by the fools. Oh God, I'm sorry…

this is not a suicide note by camelopardalisinblue, literature

Literature

this is not a suicide note

what would change if i left? would you wear your sadness like a bullet-- raw and fresh and slung, chafing, into solemn chambers; or would you swallow it down to poison your lungs, steal your breath & dissolve the remnants of me? would you smoke yourself out, a pyre of anger in one fist smouldering with resentment-- unfueled but hot and bright and burning our love to ashes; or would you hang it, trailing, coiled around your neck where it will catch, untenanted, on shards of me and tighten to choke you? would you throw in the towel and jump, too, unfettered without my soul; or would you just breathe butterflies, an exultation of relief and

Suicide. by Texting, literature

Suicidal Sickness by AzialSilvara, literature

Literature

Suicidal Sickness

I carry this note hidden in my pocket In case my suffering has been erased Honestly, I hope no one will ever read it It would mean my battles have gone to waste Every time I see them it brings me memories The faces of those who push me through There are times in life there are too many answers When only questions provide rescue They all see the weight holding my heart down My friends and family pursue my health It makes me feel warm knowing that they're trying But there are some things you have to do yourself I realize it's selfish to end my own life But I am not sure I can push through the pain There is a reason I havn't signed

suicidal. by MisfitableGrae, literature

Literature

suicidal.

it’s like she’s toeing the edge of a cliff and she’s smiling and she’s deadly and you’re standing too far back to save her and it’s just too late because she’s about to jump. --- if you want a list of reasons not to commit suicide, here it is. 1. you have two dogs that will miss you. they were wagging their tails and smiling last night when they took you to the hospital and i couldn’t find the words to tell them that they should be quiet. 2. you have a car that you cried when you got and you roll the windows down and blast music whenever you pick me up from school and i’m sorry i nev

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kairi-the-bat

About kairi-the-bat

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Artist // Hobbyist

Sep 8
United Kingdom
Deviant for 16 years
She / Her

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Favourite Movies

V for Vendetta

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

Lady Gaga, Bruno Mars, Enrique

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reading writing drawing

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kairi-the-bat

Sep 9, 2018

Moving on, invisible to the world

0 min read

So as some may know yesterday was my birthday. The first since my marriage went out the window. It’s painful looking at memories from last year feeling so loved having a husband, a home, surrounded by people who wished me happy birthday and acted like they cared. Especially since this year I’ve had none of that. Only a handful of people actually acknowledged it was my birthday or wished me well, I got a total of 3 cards, not even from several of my close family. I know it’s not what you get but my birthday is the one day where I want to feel loved or special and instead I felt lonelier than ever. I woke up after sleeping fr

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kairi-the-bat

Jul 12, 2018

Breaking the habbit

0 min read

Bad habits, we all have them. Those things we do even though we shouldn’t, but they’re familiar, and can bring comfort. Like they say it’s better the devil you know. When those habits that made us feel better stop working it can be a strange sense of relief, that you can finally get rid of the negative influence. My bad habit was my ex. When things got tough or I was going through a manic phase I’d message him and get drawn in again, because I knew he’d give me validation and make me feel better about myself. But at what cost? Seeking his approval I’d do things I knew I shouldn’t. For years he was in

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kairi-the-bat

Jul 10, 2018

Big changes 7 year update

0 min read

So it’s been years since I last wrote a journal, years even since I posted a poem. I have tried again and again over the years to come back on and update it all but I never get round to completing. I feel like I owe it to myself to write these things down so that they’re out there, and for my memory to see how things change through the years. So much has changed I barely know where to start. So the last time I wrote I was talking about Sherlock and me talking about kids and how he said he couldn’t be with me that way and how hard it was. Well twist in the tale, in January 2012 we actually got together as a couple, by Februar

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[link] u r tagged

Ok guys, this truly is freaky, the
Phone literally rang as soon as I read
The last word of this email!!!!!

I am taking the bait -
What do I have to lose right?

Hope it works!

Supposedly The Phone Will Ring
Right After You Do This.

Just read the little stories and
Think of a wish as you scroll all
The way to the bottom. There is
A message there - then make your
Wish.

No attachment on this one.

!

Stories

I'm 13 years old, and I wished
That my dad would come home from
The army, because he'd been having
Problems with his heart and right
Leg It was 2:53 p .m.. When I made
My wish. At 3: 07 PM . (14 minutes
Later), the doorbell rang, and
There my Dad was, luggage and all!!

I'm Katie and I'm 20 and I've been
Having trouble in my job and on the
Verge of quitting. I made a simple
Wish that my boss would get a new
Job. That was at 1:35 and at 2:55
There was an announcement that he
Was promoted and was leaving for
Another city. Believe me...this
Really works!!!

My name is Ann and I am 45 years
Of age. I had always been single
And had been hoping to get into a
Nice, loving relationship for many
Years. While kind of daydreaming(and right after receiving this email)
I wished that a quality person would
Finally come into my life. That was at
9:10 AM on a Tuesday. At 9:55 AM
A FedEx delivery man came into my
Office.He was cute, polite and
Could not stop smiling at me. He
Started coming back almost everyday(even without packages) and asked me
Out a week later . We married 6
Months later and now have been
Happily married for 2 years.

What a great email it was!!

Just scroll down to the end, but
While you do, think of a wish.
Make your wish when you have completed
Scrolling. Whatever age you are, is the
Number of minutes it will take for your
Wish to come true. Ex.you are 25 years
Old, it will take 25 minutes for your wish
To come true).

However, if you don't send this to
People in 5 minutes, you will have bad
Luck for years!!

Go for it!!!
!

SCROLL DOWN!!!!
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STOP!!!
Congratulations!!! Your wish will
Now come true in your age minutes.

Now follow this carefully....it
Can be very rewarding!!!!

If you send this to 10 more
People, other than the 5 that you
Already have to send to, something
Major that you've been wanting
Will happen.

Message: This is scary!

The phone will ring right after
You do this!